It’s almost midnight, the rain is tapping against the windows, and I am alone. Alone like a snow leopard. I live my life alone, amidst all the people. I think, therefore I am. Besides that, it’s just an empty life. I have so much love to give, but no one to give it to. I am sad, that’s why I take medicine. Medicine that should eliminate suicidal thoughts, medicine that should give me energy, medicine that should make me tired in the evening, medicine that works, and medicine that doesn’t work. I don’t believe that medicine can make me whole again; I am broken and so very tired. The weather and the late hour don’t make it any better or easier. It’s hard to be me. It’s hard to be ill. Can’t I find rest in your arms? I just want to feel safe and loved so I can sleep. I am unbelievably tired.